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TOPIC: The World's Best Relaxation Technique

The World's Best Relaxation Technique 12 years 6 months ago #48650

If you want to perform the world's best relaxation technique, simply follow my instructions.

Everyone can do this in their own way, but may I recommend at least this philosophy.

I call it PRACTICING TAI CHI WHILE DRINKING CHAI TEA.

First, find your favorite brand or kind of CHAI TEA.

There are lots out there!

There is green, red or brown.

Some are spicy, orange-flavored, and decaf or full caffeine!

You can drink it with or without sugar.

Or milk.

Experiment!  Find the one you like best and the best way to prepare it.

And find your special mug.

I like my Washington Redskins mug, and highly recommend using one.

In fact, NOT using a Redskins mug automatically relegates you to the world's second best relaxation technique, but I digress.

The idea, after all, is relaxation.

So, prepare your CHAI TEA your favorite way and put it in your own Redskins mug.

Then you need a spot with a shelf on the wall and a place for your TAI CHI chart.

You will understand what I mean in a minute.

Prepare your mind, and get started.

TAI CHI is described as "meditation in motion," as one gently moves, combining body and mind, and promotes relaxation through gentle movements.  It is a non-competitive, and self-paced form of physical exercise and stretching.  There are more than 100 possible movements, all named for nature and animals, that combine rhythmic patterns of movement and controlled breathing to result in an inner calm.

Combined with CHAI TEA, well, you will have fantastic results!

Placing yourself in the Starting position, put your mug of CHAI TEA on the shelf, face the shelf and begin your session of TAI CHI.  As you begin you will feel the attraction of the two poles, opposites, the yin and yang of the moment.

I call it the Jay and Jayng.

As you Part The Wild Horse's Mane, reach for and sip your CHAI TEA.
As you Brush The Knee, Push upward in addition and sip your CHAI TEA.
As you reach to Carry The Tiger Over The Mountain, grab and sip your CHAI TEA.

Hey, isn't this fun!!?

Here is the key - THIS IS YOUR MOMENT!  If some jerk approaches from behind to spoil YOUR MOMENT,

Turn
Rapidly perform the Left Heel Kick.  Aim for the stomach.
And if that Snake Creeps Through The Grass and continues to approach you,
Stand On One Leg, reach for that Creeping Snake and
Fan Through The Back, smacking the interloper on the forehead.

That should ward the little twerp off and let anyone else nearby know you are serious.

At this point continue your relaxation by a smooth Parry And Punch
And with a flourish, perform an Apparent Closing, reaching for and taking your CHAI TEA,
Drink it as you do an excellent Cross Hands.
Replace the wondrous potion on the shelf and Close.

Lather, rinse and repeat.

This is TAI CHI at its best!

I promise, the Jay Force will be with you.

Let it floooow throoooooouuuuuugh yooooooouuuuuu.

Enjoy.
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Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC
Based in Bristow, serving all of Northern Virginia
www.jaymarinspect.com
Northern Virginia Home Inspector
Festina Lente - Make Haste Slowly

Re: The World's Best Relaxation Technique 12 years 6 months ago #48664

With the large quantities of Arizona Green Tea I drink I should try your methods, any sample packs available?

Jay are you excited about RG3? The Browns had to settle for Weiden as Washington outbid the Clowns!

You should be in for a fun year for football. I am enjoying Labrons and the Heats struggles in the NBA playoffs, us Cleveland fans have vengeance on are minds, we no longer care if our teams win, we are just vindictive of ex-players(Cavs and cheap owners(Indians) - first place and lowest attendance. And for some reason the Browns have the backing of the fans but they continue to be a lousy team. My predictions as of now are 2-14 and next year there first round pick will be a quarterback  ::)

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Home Safe Home Inspections
Link Url: Cleveland Home Inspector - www.hshinspections.net/
Body:Performing Home Inspections in Cleveland, Parma, Brecksville, Broadview Heights, North Royalton, Strongsville and surrounding areas.
Keywords:Parma,Broadview...

Re: The World's Best Relaxation Technique 12 years 6 months ago #48665

Jay, you rock. Thanks for the post!!

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Dominic Maricic
Home Inspector Pro Home Inspection Software - CEO
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