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TOPIC: Bend Yer Barrier!

Bend Yer Barrier! 13 years 7 months ago #40601

Hi folks!  Billy Jays here!

Are you tired and bored with step flashing under your shingles?

Hey, I bet you're bored with flashing altogether!

You go outside, look up at your roof and think, "Gee, there's got to be an easier way to finish off the sides of my shingles without doing all that work."

Well, THINK no more!  And I mean that sincerely!

All you need is Bend Yer Barrier!

What you do is slide my convenient pieces of sheet metal against the neighbor's roof and add my new Bend Yer Barrier!

And you can trim Bend Yer Barrier! any way you want!

You want a bulge here or a valley there?

With Bend Yer Barrier! you can have either or neither.  And where you want'em!

And you won't be the only one proud to show off your new installation!  Just imagine how proud your neighbors will be to live next door!  They go to the trouble of having a new roof installed, with brand new plumbing penetration sleeves, wonder what could look better, and viola!  Exactly what could finish THEIR work off better than Bend Yer Barrier! on your roof!

I CAN'T THINK OF A THING!

But wait!  If you call within the next 20 minutes, cause we can't do this all day, AND promise to tell a friend or neighbor, we will throw in two kits of Bend Yer Barrier! for the same low price!  So call now!

Now you might be saying, "Why two kits Billy?  Isn't that just too generous of you?"

Because I want the one side of your roof to look just as good as the other!  And because a half-assed job, um, an incomplete job, is like no job at all!  We have a warehouse full of this stuff and want it out the door!

SO CALL NOW!

And wait til you see the interesting pattern of staining Bend Yer Barrier! causes on the fire walls between you and your neighbor's house!  It's like stained glass, always different, only this stain will be on your really thick drywall!

I GUARANTEE YOU - EVERY PATTERN WILL BE DIFFERENT!

And remember, with every order you get a free case of Lotsa Nuts!

When you feel like a snack, eat Lotsa Nuts!

Cause you are what you eat!

So call now!

Call now and finish off that roof in a FLASH!

And remember - why use flashing when you can install Bend Yer Barrier! in a flash!

Take it from me, Billy Jays!  Bend Yer Barrier! will change your roof!

And your life!

So call now!





Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC

Based in Bristow, serving all of Northern Virginia

www.jaymarinspect.com
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Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC
Based in Bristow, serving all of Northern Virginia
www.jaymarinspect.com
Northern Virginia Home Inspector
Festina Lente - Make Haste Slowly

Re: Bend Yer Barrier! 13 years 7 months ago #40622

Man that looks awesome! What the HECK were they thinking?

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Dominic Maricic
Home Inspector Pro Home Inspection Software - CEO

Re: Bend Yer Barrier! 13 years 7 months ago #40642

You mean when they called Billy?  They were thinking they wanted a great product with a lifetime warranty!  What kind of a question is that?

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Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC
Based in Bristow, serving all of Northern Virginia
www.jaymarinspect.com
Northern Virginia Home Inspector
Festina Lente - Make Haste Slowly

Re: Bend Yer Barrier! 13 years 7 months ago #40711

  • Dana Bostick
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Sweet Job!  That's a keeper for the Inspection Fails files. ROTFLMAO (if you're a Geek, You'll know what this means <grin>)

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True Professionals, Inc. Home inspections and Property Consultation, Litigation Support, HOA Maintenance Consulting
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Re: Bend Yer Barrier! 13 years 7 months ago #40719

I know what it means...

A ROThay is better than a ROTFL.

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Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC
Based in Bristow, serving all of Northern Virginia
www.jaymarinspect.com
Northern Virginia Home Inspector
Festina Lente - Make Haste Slowly

Re: Bend Yer Barrier! 13 years 7 months ago #40747

  • James Levy
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  • NJ#24GI00101400, FL # HI7765
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Act now! A product and application this good won't last long!  ;D

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www.homespectllc.com
Homespect LLC
Home and commercial Inspections in Medford, Mount Laurel, Cherry Hill, Voorhees, Marlton NJ, and the surrounding areas.
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